I Want........

I want to shine.
like the brightest star or the warmest sun.
I want to stand in the spotlight for all to see, to be appreciated.

but I am afraid.
Afraid of being seen. Watched. All those eyes watching. Laughing. Analyzing. Picking apart my very soul.

Seeing my "flaws" in all of their raw glory. Would you still like me then? Would I be what you wanted to see me as?

Would I be what I wanted the world to see?

I want you to see me. Me in the corner who so desperately wants to stand on that stage and shine.

I want to feel real. Like I am making a difference, that what I am doing is not a pipe dream.

I want to take that leap, but I cannot see the bottom.
Who would I hurt if I never hit the bottom?

I want so much to shine

But I am afraid.